Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies..

Please someone help me say no.
Hawa bought this book about learning to say no. Apparently she said its for me. I think I need to read it. I have to learn to say no to other people if I dont want to do what they ask me to do. I have to learn to say no to myself when I feel the urge to procrastinate. I have to learn to put my foot down and do what I HAVE to do and NEED to do rather than what other people WANT me to do.

I'm sinking back into that hell hole of procrastination, laziness and plain unproductiveness. I dont know what to do. Seriusly. I cant seem to get the willpower or motivation to do my chores and work. The thing is, sometimes I do work up enough enthusiasm to start but then something comes up that distracts me and throws me off my momentum. Then I'd have to work hard again to build up that same level of hype to continue. I hate it. Wastes a lot of time.

Im tempted to be more selfish. Like during summer, I was pretty selfish. All I cared for was being happy and doing what I wanted and needed. It made me feel content and happy but it happened to hurt and irritate other people. Im sure you say its wrong to do that. Im sure you say one shouldn't be selfish. I know if I were selfless and always willing to please and not hurt other peoples feeling, I end up like THIS. Bitter at them and at myself. For no valid reason.

Its a stupid trade off for sure. For some its a no brainer, of course you have to be selfless, its better to hurt than have other people hurt because if you. Yea rite. To others, its always putting your own self first, if you're not happy how can you make other people happy as well? So, what's a girl to do?

@ Monday, April 30, 2007 3:41 PM

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Therapeutic Ramblings
A dash of Disney, a sprinkle of pop punk, lashings of sweet treats, a pinch of superheroes, bundles of laughter and a tinge of crankyness.
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